White coat. Heels.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
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I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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