If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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