i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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