All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
