Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
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