I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize