how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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