let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize
