I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
