you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
