that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
