I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
