He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize