So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
