I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
