I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
