I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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