my phone cant type all the emotion im having
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
