K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize