when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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