After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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