Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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