I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
