hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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