Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
So vagazzling was a success
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
