If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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