meet me or not, i'm out of control
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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