Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
it's like heaven, but drunker
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
