saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
