the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
