i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
