I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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