As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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