Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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