Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
COCAINE IS GR8
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