I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
