At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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