Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
