do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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