I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
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