Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
