gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
