Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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