How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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