Taylor Swift is so right about you.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize