so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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