Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
