Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
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