no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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