Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
