I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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