why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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